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Laughter Makes The Heart Feel Lighter ---- So Lets Laugh



To Exercise or 
Not To Exercise

 


1. It is well documented that for every mile that you
jog, you add one minute to your life. This enables 
you, at age 85, to spend an additional 5 months in a
nursing home at $5,000 per month.

2. My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when
she was 60. She is now 97 and we don't know where the
hell she is.

3. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that
I could hear heavy breathing again.

4. I joined a health club last year, spent about $400.
Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

5. I have to exercise early in the morning before my
brain figures out what I am doing.

6. I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch
our toes, he would have put them further up our body.

7. I like long walks, especially when they are taken
by people who annoy me.

8. I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach
covers them.

9. The advantage of exercising every day is that you
die healthier. 

10. If you are going to try cross country skiing,
start with a small country.

11. And last, but not least, I don't jog - it makes
the ice jump right out of my glass.






BUMPER STICKERS TO RELATE TO
   


 
 
 If You Can Read This, I Can Slam On My Brakes And Sue You
 
 Jesus Loves You, The Rest Of Us Think You're An Idiot.
 
 Forget World Peace -- Visualize Turning Off Your Turn Signal!
 
 HANG UP AND DRIVE!
 
 Where There's A Will...I Want To Be In It!
 
 Ever Stop To Think, And Forget To Start Again?
 
 I Have The Body Of A God .......... Buddha
  
 This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me
 
 If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
 
 This Bumper Sticker Exploits Illiterates
 
 Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway
 
 Honk If Anything Falls Off
 
 He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest
 
 He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost, 
But Miles From The Next Exit





 
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